Nobody Understands How I Feel - Part 1

Are there times when you think you are going crazy, and when others just don’t seem to understand your condition? Emotional validation from your friends or peers is important during this time...and sometimes it feels like they just don’t get it, right?

Emotional validation is key to your healing process. I see it and talk to patients about it every day. For the patient who truly wants to get better and wants to work on their health (because it takes work), please know that your signs and symptoms do come from a true root cause. This gives you strength to know that you are not going crazy and that it’s not “all in your head".

Over the ten years in clinical practice, I have seen patients come in with almost every condition you can think of. Symptoms they’ve described involved the structural, chemical, organ, psychological, and/or bioelectric systems. And while they didn’t come in for me to treat all of those conditions, they all have one theme in mind, they just want to feel better.

I know it is hard not to feel discouraged and feel like giving up. However, here are a few basic points that I point out to myself and to patients daily.
  1. THE ROOT CAUSE
    I always point out to the patient that their symptoms all have a root cause. Always remember that, whether it is anxiety, loneliness, self shame, weight gain, chronic fatigue, etc. there is a root cause. The journey is having the patience to finding the root cause, understanding it, and working on it... even when it all feels never-ending.

  2. THE BODY IS A WHOLE SYSTEM CONNECTED BY ITS PARTS
    Remember, your body is a whole system that is biologically interconnected by different parts. This means that there can be a certain number of parts: EMOTIONS, CHEMICALS, STRUCTURE, ORGANS, ENERGY that can contribute to one condition. So we are not trying to label ourselves with a condition or sickness, we are trying to find out how all the parts may not be working properly together to give us optimal health.

  3. EMOTIONS ARE STRONGER THAN WE THINK
    Negative emotions about yourself are just as debilitating as bad back or sprained ankle; your mind perceives negative thoughts about yourself or from others with the same regard as it would a bad back. So, thinking negatively about yourself or feeling you are a burden to others can make you even sicker.

  4. THE UNKNOWN
    Discouragement or not knowing why you feel bad, drains all your energy and makes you want to give up. It’s tiring to hear other people say “it’s all in your head” or “just get up early and workout, you’ll feel better.” You need to keep as much energy as possible for healing.

  5. THE RAT RACE
    When you or I do not know the reasons why we feel bad it does not give us a goal to work for to get out of the situation we are in. This puts our brains into a “dead-end” job or “rat race" mentality, and makes us depressed or anxious because we can’t see a way out. Just knowing why a symptom occurs or might occur gives us the insight and peace that there is an explanation and an end in sight. But remember you are not labeled by your symptoms, you learn from them.

I WANT YOU TO REMEMBER 3 PHRASES WHEN IT ALL FEELS NEVER ENDING
  1. There is a root cause. VALIDATION - this is the first step to healing.
  2. You are not going crazy. Your are not “making up” your symptoms
  3. You are not lazy! Dismiss the thought you aren’t doing the right steps.
Dealing with your emotions and telling yourself these three phrases are the first step in healing. If you think something long enough, your body will follow. Part one of this blog is to remind you that you are a healing body, you are dynamic, designed to heal! You just need to find out more about yourself to start the process. Don’t be discouraged.

WHAT DO I DO FROM HERE?
I am not trying to keep you hanging on, but the info in this blog is a lot to think about and process. In Part 2, I will make some simple suggestions about clinical testing that can help you find out what may be imbalanced in the structure, chemical, organ, electric systems that could be contributing to the way you feel. Look out for it, it is something I recommend everyday to my patients.

Until next time – Be well,
Dr. Motley




Check out Part 2 of this series.

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